Every day when I look at my little girl, growing up in front of me..all I can think of is how she has so much NEW to her everyday. Everyday there is a new sentence she will learn a new way to say something old. Everyday to me is a marvel with my little girl around.
As I think back to my childhood days, I remember being very naughty. I also remember being very rebellious and difficult when I was a teenager. But I also really remember how my mother tried her hardest to make me understand life with love. She stayed up nights when we were ill, cried when we scraped our knees, nursed us when we were down. She was there always. My mother worked very hard, but she still tried her level best to put a hot meal on the table, made sure we said our prayers, kept us clean and most of all happy. Today as a grown woman I can appreciate all this.
Cause today I’m a mother too. I always loved kids. I was the neighborhood’s favorite baby sitter growing up. I knew, I wanted to be a mother even when I was 12 years old. But the first time I felt my little one kick me from inside me, it was the most profound moment of my life. There was life inside me…a life that depended on me completely. It was my largest leap of growing up ever. The sense of immediate responsibility makes your mind boggle.
Then when I saw her smile amidst pain and pants, those tiny fingers, those glimmering eyes….ahhh…that was pure bliss for me. But the real test of motherhood comes amid the smiles. When she would cry all night, when she would get a nappy rash or when she would get a fever….oh I would cry with her too-buckets! My own mum would say, “I haven’t seen you cry this much in so many years, the way you are crying for your little one.” Its kind of true.I literally started appreciating my mother and all she did and still does for us.
I feel at all times, my girl is like this little person who is walking around the world with my heart totally attached to her. The attachment, the love, the connection, the bliss is more precious to me than all treasures of all the worlds put together.
Lessons I learned from 6 years of motherhood:
- To Love Unconditionally- I knew ‘love’ long before having a baby. Or atleast I thought I knew love. But when you carry and nurture a baby for nine months inside of you, feeling her every move, hearing her every thought…and then when she comes into the world-seeing her every tear, feeling all her pain and knowing, just knowing …as a mother you will be so completely in love with her divinity. I know what she needs before she needs it, or ever asks for it….I feel her moods change, even before she does….if thats not proof of unconditional love what is? I feel like, I will never be able to love her enough….there is still so much love to give….sometimes even I’m in complete amazement at how much love I can feel for this little angel of mine.
- To Appreciate Purity- Life conditions you to be strong. To be logical. In the process we kind of lose our pure divine states. But becoming a mother, opens you up to so much purity. The purity of the child’s smile, the child’s love, the child’s actions towards you. You cant help but appreciate Purity in its true state…and have some rub off on you too. I always feel like children are Gods little angels, full of love and purity.
- To go Back to Innocence- As we grow up and take responsibility of life and all things in it, our own innocence gets covered up in layers of worldliness. But with a child in the house, there are innocent questions, there are innocent conversations, there are innocent ring-a-ring-a-roses and chook chook trains and doll houses and tea parties…..how can the innocence of it all not take you back to that childlike state of complete innocence. There is a certain charm, a certain divinity that comes forth from pure innocence.
- Acquired Tremendous Patience- Children are little angels, but can be naughty too. Parenting and motherhood requires that we nurture our little ones to the best of our ability….yes, even in the middle of a grocery store “I want chocolate” tantrum. At times like these patience is the only virtue that can keep you sane. I have to admit it took me a while to get this one right. The little trick for me is to be calm myself, and then handle whatever tantrums that come my way. Calm me, calms her faster :)
- Fine tuned my personality- Here in comes the taking responsibility bit. When you realize your every move, every word is being watched with complete and total attention and even emulated, it jolts the daylights out of you. Especially when the little one picks up on a something not-so-good you might’ve said or done. Its incentive enough to clean up your act. After all we are the role models for our children. Being a positive role model is all I can think of since I have become a mother.
Noone really has the perfect relationship with their mother’s, but whats imperative is that the love and the connection don’t change. Situations change, Love doesn’t.
Today as a grown woman, as a mother, as a human being I try my level best to live a conscious life. But even then, I make mistakes. I fall. And that’s ok. I learn, I understand and move ahead with the lessons I learned along the way. Its because of this reason and this reason only, I can let go of the little imperfections of my mother. Infact, thats what makes her more interesting to me today. Today she is my best friend and even my BFF :) We talk about everything, share everything. Yes, she still lectures me, corrects me, takes my case and we do disagree on so many things……but like I said earlier, the love hasn’t changed. I know she means well and says, and does everything out of love. I might not understand those reasons sometimes…but that doesn’t affect our relationship. After-all I’m no perfect little daughter either na :) We all have our minor imperfections.
Love does truly Conquer all!
Today on this precious day full of love I salute the spirit of every Mother. The spirit of every Child that teaches the mother new lessons everyday and vice versa.
What are YOUR thoughts on Mother’s Day? What are the lessons you have learned from motherhood or parenthood? How have these lessons changed you? Do share your wondrous thoughts in the comments below and if you liked this article/blog, share it on facebook, twitter…and better still Send it to your Mother with a note saying “I love you” :)
HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY to each and every one of you!!!
Shower some love today…and everyday :)
With Immense Love & Gratitude,
Counseling Psychologist/ Spiritual Counselor
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