Stress Less

Effect of StressThe six fundamental steps to improved health

More than two-thirds of visits to doctors’ surgeries are for stress-related illnesses. Stress has been linked to headaches, backaches, insomnia, anger, cramps, elevated blood pressure, chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromyalgia and lowered resistance to infection. For women, stress is a key factor in hormonal imbalances resulting in menstrual irregularities, PMS, fibroids, endometriosis and fertility problems. Stress can also be a factor in the development of almost all disease states, including cancer and heart disease; the leading cause of death in men & women. In most cases stress is a result of letting life get out of balance. This happens when we put all our energy into only one or two areas of our life (usually work) and ignore the rest.

We take on too much, over-promise, don’t delegate and push our own wants and needs into the background by always looking after others needs first. Continue reading “Stress Less”

How NOT to Panic-The Wallet Incident

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Last night My Hubby came home from an out of town trip. Ok so what’s the not to panic part about this?? I’ll tell you what…this morning when we were unpacking, his wallet wasn’t to be seen anywhere! I actually started freaking out, considering all the worst possible scenarios. Firstly, what was in that wallet??Credit cards, Debit cards, Identity card, Pan card among other paper work. No money thank god..Cause during the trip he kept the money in another pocket.

Irrespective of that..i started telling him…what’s wrong with you..why cant you be more careful? What if whoever found it uses your credit cards..oh god oh god…etc etc…you know us nagging wives!!! To which he gave an explanation (poor thing), that it probably got snipped during his journey..Cause he was sure he had it on him. But I couldn’t stop freaking out but, well he was surprisingly calm. Hmm..I wonder why???

After I finished my panicking (nearly 10 minutes) ..i started thinking..we can always handle this situation. There has got to be a solution to this…and then I panic again…seeing which my darling hubby says, “don’t worry! I will handle it. I needed new cards anyway..the other ones were getting too old. And I will make a stay on them as well so no one can use them. The paper work wasn’t that necessary. I will have it replaced.” …and he went on about how it was all ok. All the time he was explaining I was getting calmer and calmer and finally I was totally fine.

When I was sitting and thinking about the whole situation, I realized that my hubby was just reinforcing what I keep saying to myself and to others…to think positively in all situations or rather to see the positives in all situations. And the best part was that before I could start thinking positively he already had the solution to the problem. Smarty Pants Hubby!! This in turn made me stop panicking. Hmm…now I know why he was so calm? He already had a solution to the problem.

So bottom line before you start panicking about any given situation, first think of a solution to the problem and then well, you won’t even need to panic.

Have any of you ever had any panicky situations recently? Let me know how you handled them. I might learn a thing or two. Do leave a comment so I know…

I am still Positively Learning 🙂  Are you?

(Thank you Hubby dearest, I don’t know what I would do without you around to straighten me out! You make me learn something new everyday.)


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See The Positives In All Situations

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{Total Read Time- 7 mins.}

Avoid negative thoughts of powerlessness, dejection, failure, and despair. Chronic stress make us vulnerable to negative suggestion. Learn to focus on positives.

  • Focus on your strengths

  • Learn from the stress you are under

  • Look for opportunities in the stressful situation

  • Seek out the positive – make a change

Here is one way to get out of the destructive negative thinking habits. All possible situations we face can be classified into two categories:

One: Situations where we can do something about to change the outcome.

In this case, don’t just sit there and worry about it. Go ahead and take care of it. You have control. Procrastination is the root cause for many stressful episodes.

Second: Situations where you have no control on the outcome.

In this case sitting and worrying will not make any difference on the outcome. So, don’t worry about it. Let the situation resolve by itself; you cannot do anything about this anyway.

When all seems to be doom and gloom, there are still positive possibilities; you just have to look for them. Too often, we only focus on the negatives.

Learn to look at every difficult situation as a present; the gift within is the possibilities it holds. To open the gift you must find the “possibility.”

When you are in a difficult or a stressful situation, reflect on the following four questions:

1) Could it be worse?
2) Are there lessons I can learn to avoid a similar situation in the future?
3) What good can be realized?
4) What am I going to do about it?

COULD IT BE WORSE?

In the majority of cases, there is always a worse situation we could be in. By reflecting on a worse situation, it helps put the current situation into perspective.

ARE THERE LESSONS I CAN LEARN TO AVOID A SIMILAR SITUATION IN THE FUTURE?

Look at the situation. Could it have been avoided? Don’t go beating yourself up for not realizing this previously. Learn from the situation. Mistakes are our greatest teachers! No sense dwelling on the issue. Recognize and think of ways for the future to avoid a similar situation and then move on! Remember you can’t change the past, but you can change the future!

WHAT GOOD CAN BE REALIZED?

This is the gift. Rather than focusing our energy and thoughts on the negative of the situation, look for the positive. Sometimes you have to look hard, sometimes you don’t even realize until later. But in every situation, there is positive, you just have to find it! By focusing on the positive you are helping to reduce your stress levels!

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?

In my opinion, this is the most critical! What are you going to do? Often just by taking action, by doing something about the situation we can relieve the stress and help correct the situation.

Here are a couple of real life examples:

Example 1 -You have lost your job.

*Could it be worse? You bet. You could have lost your health and without your health you could not obtain any type of work.

*Are there lessons you could learn? Depending on the circumstances, absolutely. Did you bring value to your company, (suggesting ways to improve company profits, continuing your education, etc) or, did you see the situation coming but did nothing to further yourself, such as looking for other employment.

*What good can be realized? You can look for a job in an area that you have an interest in where you may find a better opportunity.

*What am I going to do? Start looking for another job!

Example 2 – I don’t have enough money to buy Christmas/Eid/Diwali… presents.

*Could it be worse? You bet! You could not have enough money to pay your rent/mortgage.

*Are there lessons you could learn? Possibly. Could you have started your shopping earlier taking advantage of sales; could you have made your own gifts; etc?

*What good can be realized? Look around you and be thankful for what you have, appreciate life. Sometimes a note to someone just telling them what they have meant in your life is worth more than anything money could buy. Great suggestions you say, but what if the gifts are for my children – they don’t want a note. In these cases, ask for help from very close family or friends. There are times in all of our lives we need help from others. I truly believe what comes around, goes around. The day will come when your circumstances will be better and you will be able to help a family.OR Go and make something sweet for your kids. Its cheap and holds so much value when its made out of love. The point is there is always a positive solution, we just have to look for it.

*What am I going to do? Rather than sit and feel sorry for yourself, take action, either write that letter, ask for help! OR go ahead and make those gifts!

Example 3 – A simple everyday example is a situation I found myself in last week. I was behind in my work, major work were overdue. I was creating stress for myself just thinking about everything I had to accomplish. I stopped for two minutes and asked myself the four questions:

*Could it be worse? Yes, I could have no job, no income

*Are there lessons I could learn? Yes, I need to set more realistic deadlines, and employ better time management skills.

*What good can be realized? The realization that I was overwhelming myself to the point I was wasting time. Rather than thinking about it, and shuffling the paper from one pile to the next, if I broke the projects down and focused on the smaller task I could have them done by the end of the week.

*What am I going to do? I prioritized and started working with a focus, rather than an overwhelming feeling.

The key to moving on is forgiveness–of self and others. Although it is a waste of energy to worry about future events over which we have no control, it is human nature to do so. Plan and prioritize as best you can, and then be easy on yourself. The future hasn’t happened, and the past is not going to happen again. In the words, “Be here now.” You can start by recognizing and accepting when a situation is beyond your control.

If you focus on the possible positives when you experience difficult situations, YOU CAN positively change your outlook, reduce your stress, and concentrate on achieving things that otherwise may not have been possible.


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