“Smile, breathe and go slowly.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
It’s happened to all of us at some point in time. There is something you really, really want. You want it so badly you can taste it. Whether it’s a relationship, a promotion, a new career, the accomplishment of a lifetime goal, the attainment of a particular lifestyle or the acquisition of a shiny new “toy”, whatever it may be, you know it’s not only what you want but what you need. You know it’s right for you and nothing short of exactly what you want, the way you want it will do. And so you set about making it happen. Perhaps you used the law of attraction, the power of positive thinking, affirmations and visualizations. Or, maybe you took another approach through, prayer, ritual, meditation or ceremony to focus your will and intent. Or, maybe you created a concrete plan of action to help you get what you wanted. You may have tried one or all of the above. You may have done everything “right”. You may have even come very close to getting what you want, but you still didn’t get it. Sucks doesn’t it?
So why didn’t it work? What could have possibly gone wrong? Aren’t we supposed to be able to manifest everything and anything we want if we just “go about it right”? Well, that’s the theory anyway. But it in real life it doesn’t always work out that way.
Of course there are many reasons why we might not get what we want . . . maybe we are blocking the very thing we want with our own insecurities, beliefs, or lack of clarity about what we want and/or need; maybe we don’t believe we can have what we want; maybe we don’t feel we deserve it; maybe we don’t know how to effectively co-create with the Universe to manifest what we want; maybe . . . fill in the blank with any number of things that interfere with our ability to effectively manifest what we want. But sometimes, no matter how focused, positive and clear you are, or how deeply you believe that you can manifest what you want, and no matter what you do, the Universe just says no! Why? Because sometimes the Universe just has other plans, and, sometimes, those plans are more wonderful than anything we could possibly imagine or dream of ourselves.
This happened to me few years ago with something I really wanted that obviously, I didn’t get, or I wouldn’t be mentioning it here. And believe me I wanted it bad. I did everything I possibly could to manifest the outcome that I wanted. But, it didn’t quite work out the way I wanted it to. And boy was I unhappy about that. Now before you think, well, maybe she just doesn’t know how to manifest things, it’s important that you understand that I’m quite good at manifesting. I have manifested and accomplished some amazing things in my life, often in the face of what some might call insurmountable odds, and with little or no significant emotional, mental or financial support from others, and despite people telling me it couldn’t be done, or that I couldn’t to it.
But this thing I wanted a few years ago, I just couldn’t make it happen, no matter how hard I tried or what I did. And believe me, I used every manifestation tool I knew of, within ethical boundaries of course, but to no avail. I still didn’t get what I wanted. And at the time, I was one unhappy camper let me tell you. I simply couldn’t understand, how this thing I wanted so much and that I knew was so right for me, this thing that I knew was meant to be, just wasn’t happening. If you had told me then that I would later be grateful that I hadn’t gotten what I wanted, I would have told you to go fly a kite. But, that’s exactly what happened.
After several years, I one day found myself saying thank you, thank you, thank you to the Universe for saving me from myself. ‘Cause sometimes what we want, just isn’t good for us. I’m reminded of a saying that is meant as a curse in some cultures, “May you get everything you want.” And that’s exactly what it would have been for me if I’d gotten what I wanted back then, a curse rather than a blessing. In my case, what I wanted was a particular outcome in a particular relationship, a relationship that I had in fact manifested but that wasn’t going exactly the way I expected. Now for those of you who think, aha, that was the problem, she focused on a particular person….well, not quite. I manifested the relationship itself initially as I focused on what I wanted in a relationship, or what I thought I wanted at the time, not on a particular person, and let’s just say it still didn’t quite work out the way I thought it should.
It may have taken a while, but eventually I was able to see that a higher wisdom than my own earthbound personality and ego had intervened and saved me from myself. For given the opportunity, I would have taken that relationship to the “next level”, and while I may have been happy for a brief moment, in the long run I would have been very, very, unhappy. But I couldn’t see that at the time. All I knew then was that I wasn’t getting what I wanted. And I was a bit put out to say the very least.
Now, after several years, I have the perspective, clarity and experience to see that situation in a new light. For not only would I not have been happy in the long term if things had worked out according to my plan, getting what I wanted in that particular instance would have prevented me from exploring some very interesting opportunities that have come my way since then, all of which I have learned from and have enriched my life greatly in one way or the other – opportunities that I wasn’t even able to conceive of all those years ago.
While manifesting the life I deserve, I now focus on being open to the opportunities that are aligned with my inner peace, happiness and well-being, rather than a specific concrete outcome. And that has worked out much better for me. I have learned that sometimes, by focusing too much on the thing we want, or the door that has become closed to us, we can’t see all the other wonderful opportunities that are available to us, all the other doors that are wide open just waiting for us to walk through them. I have learned that sometimes what we want, isn’t always right for us, even though at the time we may think that it is. I have learned that not everything that we do manifest should necessarily be followed to it’s “ultimate” conclusion, that sometimes it’s just one of many experiences for us to have in this life, and that what we perceive to be the goal or objective may simply be a stepping stone to another level of self-awareness and understanding, merely another step on the journey. I have learned that the wise person knows how to co-create with the Universe and flow with it, changing course when necessary rather then being fixed on a particular outcome. And it has become clear to me that sometimes, no matter how much we want it, how hard we may work for it, or “work to manifest it”, whatever it may be, that sometimes, the Universe has other plans, and those plans are more wonderful and exciting than anything we could possibly have imagined.
“Flow with whatever is happening and let your mind be free. Stay centered by accepting whatever you are doing. This is the ultimate.” – Chuang Tzu
Now its your turn….Do you go with the flow of the Universal Plan..or are you rigid with trying to manifest exactly what you need?
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Excellent post – right on!
HI Jeanne,
Glad you liked it. Thank you for your lovely compliment 🙂
I truly believe this, Beautiful Zeenat, and you said it so eloquently. We simply don’t know what we don’t know (!!), and that means we cannot know what is in our highest good at all times. Therefore, whenever I’m manifesting something, I like to add, “…this or something better.” Because lord knows, that “something better” is probably something I could not yet conceive of, but since God has my back, he’ll cover the details for me.
This is just awesome. I’m retweeting now! (You’re so good!)
HI Megan My Joyful Angel,
I do the same thing when i am manifesting through prayers. I ask God to tell the universe to be good to everyone….me included 🙂
God always has our back….we can ask for crazy things..but leave it to him to set everything right and deliver at just the perfect time…:)
Glad you liked this post sweet angel. And thank you gazillions for the tweet 🙂
Much Love~
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Hi Zeenat,
I so agree with all that you wrote. One of the first things I learned on my spiritual journey was that if something does not work out it is for my own good. That one perception changed so much for me. What we want sometimes may not be good for us. So if something works, that is awesome. But if something does not, that is awesome too.
The Universe is merciful and only looks out for our best interests. With that preception, everything becomes a blessing in disguise.
Thank you for such a beautiful post! Love and blessings to you! 🙂
Hi Nadia,
A blessing in disguise is the perfect way of describing God’s and The Universe’s plans. Our spiritual journey teaches us so much….just being open to all of it makes for bliss.
Thank you fro your lovely thoughts on this post 🙂
Much Love~
Thanks for sharing such a wonderful thoughts.
Hi Preetha,
Glad you liked this post. Thank you for your sweet comment here 🙂
Karma? 🙂
HI Braja,
Karma….now thats an expansive word and thought for this post 🙂 The universe knows all….we do one good deed and it comes back to us ten folds….Hence lets leave the planning to God and his universe…and live good lives..right..:)
gosh zeenat, you put so many things in the right perspective for me. now i need to learn more about manifesting from you…
Hi Suzy,
Am glad my learning experiences are putting things in perspective for you…as for manifesting….am planning to write a post on that in the next few weeks. I guess you can get all the info in it 🙂
Much Love~
Hi Zeenat ..thanks so much for your first sentence –
“Smile, breathe and go slowly.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
Just what I need now – you always have this lovely calm about you, your words and your site ..
Hi Hilary,
Isnt that quote just perfect…:) Its calming and just so simple….so simply emphasizing to go with the universal flow.
Thank you for your beautiful compliments about the blog ..appreciate them 🙂
Much Love~
Wonderful post Zeenat. As I was reading it I was thinking about how we sometimes need to let go of the things we really desire in order for it to happen and if it doesn’t happen it wasn’t meant to be. You put it wonderfully when you said:
“Cause sometimes what we want, just isn’t good for us”
Thank you.
Hi Steven,
Letting go…so true…it is sometimes the hardest thing to do….but when we want to and really desire something…we will let go of our concrete mindsets…and go with the flow of the Universe. And that flow will actually prove to be the best thing for us.
Thank you for your wonderful comment here.
Much love~
“Cause sometimes what we want, just isn’t good for us”
🙂
Well Zeenat, you definitely made a point here. I am 18 years old, and in the last few years, I have gone through quite a few so-called “styles”. At one point I wanted my parents to buy heavy metal T-shirts, then I wanted hippie shirts, then elegant shoes, etc, etc. I am glad that they didn’t buy me all the 20 rock band T-shirts I asked them to. They bought 3. And that’s okay. If we don’t get what we want or what we need or what we think we need – well, that’s not always a bad thing.
Thanks for the post,
Zoli
Hi Zoli,
Nice to see you here 🙂
ohhh believe me I went through those phases when i was a teen too! I was the worst possible teenager..ask my mum!
God, Universe and our parents all know whats good for us…
Glad you liked this post. Thank for your awesome Comment 🙂
Hi Zeenat,
I’ve learned this lesson and sometimes I need to remind myself that I have. I’ll desperately be trying to swim upstream, wondering why all of these obstacles are in my path. I’ll wrestle them into submission and beat my head against the wall until the realization hits me: I’m supposed to be doing something else. Oh, that’s right. NOW I remember.
You put this concept wonderfully into this post.
George
HI George,
We all need to remind ourself constantly…we all get caught up in this path of obstacles…..But i think practice makes the obstacle stretch shorter and shorter…
Glad you liked this post.
Thank you fro your awesome thoughts on this 🙂
Again, you’ve presented us with a beautiful collection of words, Z! And you’ve made us search our hearts, reflect, and consider what truly should BE.
You know, I’ll be honest: Many times in my life, I’ve fought the “universe” and had to be put in my place. I dug my heels in deep and fought hard for something that wasn’t good for me. Like George, I’ve learned this lesson a long time ago – but have to be reminded ever so often. Sheesh. You’d think my memory would be better. 😉
Thanks, Z! You’re the bestest!!
Hugs,
M
HI Michele,
Believe me….we all need to be reminded time and again…its cause our brain loves to go for the same old patterns….breaking those patterns takes practice. With constant breaks in the patterns..we will have fewer obstacles and less fighting with the universe….more going with the flow with the universe will happen naturally.
Youre better than the bestest !! 😉
Love and Hugs to you ~
Lots of wisdom in this post–thank you for sharing!
In my life, I tend to allow each day to unfold as it is meant to. If I notice I am trying to control something that is my reminder to breathe deeply and be mindfully present. If my heart truly wants something, I ask please show me the best path and guide me along that path. I believe all that I want/need is already in my life, I just need to be open and ready to allow for it.
And yes, I agree that sometimes what I believe I need and what I truly need can be two completely different paths. I also know that if I skip a lesson, Life will later stop me, I will regress a few steps to learn the lesson, then move forward again. There is a progression, even if my will exerts itself. I am pretty much heart led through life, so really try to grow through heart centered ways.
Hi Joy,
Being Mindfully present…now thats awesome advice!
Youre so right when you say..what we want is already in our lives..we just need to open and ready to allow it in our heart and mind.
You and me both are heart centered hmm….so good to meet another hearty gal 🙂
Thank you for your beautiful and uplifting thoughts on this.
Much Love~
Hi Zeenat,
I am sure that you have heard this quote “Sometimes we stare so long at a door that is closing that we see too late the one that is open.” It’s great that you allow grace into each moment of now for possibilities to open up. Flowing with the Universal Plan may not sound as easy as it looks but it is definitely a great intent!
All the best,
Evelyn
Hi Evelyn,
Thats a powerful quote….I hadnt heard it before…so thank you so much for sharing.
It does really sum up this post very well.
Youre right when you say its the right intent that makes all the difference. I guess framing the right intent comes with practice too 🙂
Thank you fro your lovely comment 🙂
Much Love~
It sounds good by me ..great post 🙂
Hi Fatima,
Glad you liked this post 🙂 Thanks for your comment 🙂
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Dear Zeenat, I absolutely loved this post and thank for reminding that everything is always happenning for my highest good, I deinitely needed that reminder today. You are awesome!
HI Lana,
I am so glad This post was as source of the right kind of reminder to you. Always happy to be a positive reminder 🙂
Thank you for your lovely thoughts on this 🙂
Youre awesome too !!! 🙂
Dear Z
Your post shows how confusing and new all this manifesting still is.
I can do it in certain areas and I cannot do it in others.
I also do not always know when it does not appear at the time when I want it, that it is because I did something wrong or indeed it is not good for e to have it.
There are still many things I do not know about the be-ing part of the manifesting process.
When I am in the flow, when I am supposed to be pulling y weight, when I can relax and be peaceful, when I need to stop wanting and accepting it is NOT coming.
Still lots of questions and I think that is good, at least we know we are not aster of the process.
I’d say it keeps us on our toes until we do it peacefully, while paying attention and being love-in-action.
Big hug and all will be well, XOXOXO Wilma
HI Wilma,
Love in action is exactly what we all need to BE! I like to think….that when we are love in all we do…God tells the universe to be Loving towards us too.
I loved your comment so so much! Thank you 🙂
Much Love~
Zeenat,
This is a great reminder and you put it so well. Most times I don’t know what’s best for me;) I also thing when we focus on the outcome we are unhappy but when we invest in the process we can’t go wrong.
I was listening to a speaker a while back say one guy who was a big part of the secret is bald. He wants to know if this stuff works…why doesn’t this guy manifest hair? The audience had a good laugh with that one!
HI Tess,
Thats a good one Tess….Manifest hair..ha…
Youre right…we are all far too focused on the end result….if only we paid that much attention to the process success would be our irrespective…
Thank you for your wonderful comment here 🙂
We are not the center of the universe. Sometimes there is a ripple effect to what we want and how it will affect others as well. Nice post.
Hi Erin,
I agree with you completely….sometimes we can become so selfish with our own wants ..that we forget..it might also affect others…Ripple effect is the exact term for this.
Thank you for sharing your lovely thoughts on this 🙂 Glad you liked the post.
Zeenat — I enjoyed reading this because I’ve had similar experiences. I think I know exactly what I want and then get it only to discover it was just a part of the journey.
When I studied to be a life coach, I was positive I had found my perfect career. I worked on affirmations and seriously tried to manifest this destiny. While coaching was good, I always felt something was missing. Yet, I stuck with it.
In the meantime, as part of my coaching practice, I started to blog. Slowly, but surely, I found the writing was opening doors for me, allowing me to rediscover my own passion for writing.
The point is this: I worked hard to manifest life coaching as a career, but it was not to be. On the other hand, I may not have rediscovered this passion for writing if I had not decided to be a life coach. It wasn’t my destination, but rather the vehicle to get me to my next stop in life:~)
I say when we talk to the Universe, we speak with our hearts…and the Universe will always answer the heart:~)
Hi Sara,
Youre so so right on this!
Many times we think we know for sure what we want..but somewhere along the way …those wants change……We need to be accommodating enough to go with the flow of those wants..and not be rigid with the end result.
And speaking to the universe with heart is the best and only way i know that the Universe will respond positively…..:)
Thank you fro your lovely thoughts on this 🙂
Hi Z! How magnificently put! Spot on! And done so with your grace and love, as always! 🙂 I have been participating in the whole manifesting process for many years, in fact, I did it before it was even called manifesting and became so popular! I just called it giving life to my dreams! Whatever you want to call it, it works!
I always allow for the Universe to manifest what I THINK I’m trying to manifest, in its own way. Often allowing for the freedom you need to give (call it latitude or whatever) the Universe, it will make the adjustments necessary that you maybe didn’t know or think about it. In other words, I put it out there and accept whatever happens with a grateful heart – no matter what!
Hugs to my beautiful manifestation partner!
suZen
Oh Suzen,
I love how you say you so openly trust the universe. It took me a long to get to that point…but i got to it…so now…I know the Universe has my back…and it will not let me down 🙂
What fun …I think i need to start manifesting…a meeting between all my blogging pals 🙂
Hugs to you too 🙂
Zeenat, I can totally understand your feelings of disappointment a few years ago because I’ve been in your shoes a few times. Now I am so glad that my wrong manifests didn’t workout because I could not even dream about having such a wonderful life that I have now. God (I use God instead of the Universe because I am a Christian) has planned a much better life for me and He knew exactly what would be good for me and what won’t.
I think it is important to have plans, goals and desires but you are so right saying that we must still be always open to possibilities. There are so many wonderful things in this world that a lot of times we cannot even embrace them all and we need a higher guidance to show us how beautiful our life can really be.
Hi Ana,
I only ask God too 🙂 I tell God to please make the universe kind to me….and make it work for me…the best way He possibly thinks it should. God knows best right 🙂 I think an ultimate faith in a higher power is indeed the best way to be at ease that yes, things will eventually work out for the better….the way they should!
Thank you for your lovely thoughts on this 🙂
This is so lovely, Dear Sweet Z. So you. I absolutely agree with you. I’ve found that every time I thought something didn’t work out, that is was the Universe trying to steer me in the direction I needed to go, but couldn’t see. When I was younger I thought I had to be totally in control of my life. And I now, trust a much bigger unfolding, a much bigger Being or the Universe who knows what I need and where I need to go. That doesn’t mean that I don’t listen to my heart and do all I can toward actively living its direction, it just means that I also embrace things as they come and believe there is a bigger picture that I can’t always see. Gosh you are beautiful. Like balm for humanity. You really are. I love you very much precious Zeenat, and I think of you often. Robin
Hi Robin,
Such a loving comment..it brought tears of joy to my eyes. I think of you often too. I just get so caught up with life..that i have reduced my online time…hence dont reach all the blogs i love as often as i would really want to.
Thank you for stopping by and spreading you love…I know your comment always hugs me like a warm blanket. It hugs my blog too 🙂
Lots of love to you~
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I can relate to your views because that is how I managed to stay afloat despite the disappointments and hiccups life posed before me. Instead of sticking rigidly to my ambition or likes, I just changed my approach and aspirations like free flowing water in accordance with the trend and I am quite happy today.
HI R Saraswathan,
Am so glad to know you have learned to go with the flow. It is definitely the way to live a happy and more productive life.
Thank you for sharing your wonderful thoughts on this topic 🙂
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