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Why You NEED to Banish New Year Resolutions & Make ONLY Three Promises

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why-you-need-to-banish-new-year-resolutions-make-only-three-promises

For last year’s words belong to last year’s language And next year’s words await another voice.’ ~ T. S. Eliot

As the year end inches closer and closer, I find myself introspecting a whole lot. I find myself thinking about the year in terms of achievements, high points, low points, successes, failures, learning points etc. Introspection and a constant need to be a better more evolved human(e) being makes me think of the year that’s gone by in a learning light. I have definitely learnt a whole LOT this past year.

We are all in a state of constant growth, be it physical, mental or spiritual. We don’t necessarily like to believe we are growing constantly, cause that would mean an admittance to NOT knowing EVERYTHING. Funny how we love to show the world we are master champions about everything, but in reality we are just trying SO hard to fit in.

Why I Banished New Year Resolutions

As another NEW YEAR sets in, we WILL be pulled into the ‘making resolutions’ race. Yes its the IN thing to do and discuss in the last week of the old year and first week of the new year….but is it really worth it? Like I said earlier, we are all just trying to fit in…but this trying to do what everyone else is doing doesn’t really feed our soul. It doesn’t make you achieve anything. Its funny how everyone comes up with these mammoth resolutions at the end of every year only to break them in a few weeks or months into the new year.

I stopped making new year resolutions many years back. In-fact I downright banished them from my psyche. Why? Because I hated how they made me feel when I “couldn’t” live up-to my own oh so high standards. I tell you, I used to make outrageously unrealistic resolutions. It took me many years to realize that this was causing more havoc than growth in me. I have since devised an all year round positive alternative ~ Promises to Myself.

The ONLY Three Promises You NEED to make to yourself For a Truly Positive New Year

“I am the captain of my fate, I am the master of my destiny” ~ Henry Ford

When it comes to promises to myself as compared to resolutions, I find I am more than just kind to myself while making these promises. Because a promise usually comes straight from the heart. The journey towards keeping that promise then becomes a soul nurturing experience full of new learning and happiness.

Over the past few years I have made many promises to myself and very successfully so. But, there are two promises I keep making every year. These promises make me feel like am indeed creating positive change IN me and around me. These promises bring happiness in my hands for me to choose and make mine as I so please.

Let me share them with you today, so that you too may live a positively empowered and happy life…..today, tomorrow, next year, to infinity and beyond 🙂

1) “I promise to Love Myself no matter what.”

To love yourself means to accept yourself as you are warts, moles, bulges, big personality, craziness and all. To truly accept myself and come to a point where I feel comfortable in my own skin was the hardest thing I have had to do. I had addictions, issues with body image, complexes etc. We cannot truly enjoy happiness if we are not at peace with ourself. Our relationship with ourself is the most important one we’ll ever have.

Today, with this new found love for self, I don’t depend on others for my happiness. I am my own happiness. I create my own freedom, my own life…the way I want it, without anyone else’s influence. Simply because, my whole being feels loved and whole.

Self-love means that your well-being matters to yourself unconditionally and in practical terms: (a)Who you are is more important than what you are. (b) You are valuable. Nothing can change that. (c) What you want always matters.

2) “I promise to Let Go of any and all negativity IN me and around me.”

To let go of negativity means to let go of all that is holding you back from emerging into your truest self. You must let go of past pain through forgiveness. You must let go of limiting beliefs by opening your mind to learning. You must let go of fear by going forth and doing what frightens you. You must let go of toxic relationships that are preventing you from being your True self. You must let go of self judgement by loving yourself. You must let go of sadness by adding conscious dashes of happiness in your life. You must let go of bad habits by replacing them with positive habits. You must let go of all that doesn’t nourish your heart and soul.

It is only when we can consciously let go of all that is negative in our lives, that we can make space for the positive. I began letting go many years back…slowly. One step at a time. Its a process of learning and evolving into your highest self. And this is one process that follows us beyond this physical life. It dawned on me a while back, that all that I had become was the sum total of what OTHERS wanted me to become….that was like a jolt of gigantic proportions. The first step of letting go of negativity is always always always Forgiveness of self. For when our heart is pure our world automatically adjusts to become more positive and happy.

3) “I promise to make everyday my best day yet.”

To make everyday your best day yet means to make sure that you live everyday like it was your last. You don’t live with regrets and “should’ves”. You seize every moment of everyday.

MY EVERYDAY PROMISE TO MYSELF: Everyday of every year, I make a Promise to Myself to be braver than my past, to be stronger than the struggle… So that I may enjoy new and exciting adventures everyday.

Give yourself a gift by making these three promises to yourself. Its a promise your future(more happier!) self will thank you for. And, when you make a promise to yourself like the ones above, your heart will tune into it and create pathways where you never thought possible. All those tiny resolutions like losing weight, getting a promotion, moving to another country, finding your true love….will automatically manifest right in front of you EFFORTLESSLY….because you made space for it by letting go and loving yourself.

LET a Happier and more Positive YOU emerge in this coming year.

What are your thoughts on new year resolutions? How many have you made only to be broken? Will you be making these soul nourishing promises to yourself this new year? Share your beautiful thoughts in the comments on this article. I’d love to hear from you!


Thank you SO much for reading! If this article touched your heart, please share it on your favorite social networks. Every share, like or tweet makes me reach more people who need a positive healing nudge in their lives. I appreciate you! And, If you’re new, please subscribe for free updates by email.  Love always, ~Zeenat~

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Author: Zeenat {PositiveProvocations.com}

Counseling Psychologist/ Spiritual Counselor/Motivational Speaker/Naturopath/Holistic Healer/Writer

12 thoughts on “Why You NEED to Banish New Year Resolutions & Make ONLY Three Promises

  1. I love your three promises, Zeenat. That would certainly help anyone stay focused, happy, and productive throughout the year. The promises seem so much more doable that New Year’s resolutions. Thanks and have a wonderful 2017!

  2. Hi Zeenat, I am sincerely touched by your article. I can say for sure from experience that I have made so many newyear’s resolutions that I had broken starting from the 1st of January(lol) and it really sucks because you feel you could not live up to standard and this feelings are not healthy. They make you believe less in yourself and by the end of the year you see that you become a lesser person than you were last year. I know every one has their own unique ways of absorbing things and living but it is always better not to make rigid decisions about live but to just make positive promises and live life because even creation itself is not rigid, there is always constant movement. this is what makes life so beautiful.

  3. Like you, I have stopped making resolutions many years ago. I love your three promises.

  4. Funny Zeenat…I banished new year’s resolutions many years ago too. These days I have desires to fulfill which, energetically, feels so much better. I think the connotations with those pesky resolutions are part of the problem, at least for me. I love the idea of your 3 promises…what a great way to move into the next wonderful year of life.

  5. Yes, yes, yes! I stopped making resolutions years ago and I LOVE your three things to promise myself! YOU ROCK!!

  6. I love your three promises Zeenat! I threw away resolutions years ago and make intentions, thanks for your inspirational writings.

  7. I love this so much, Zeenat! I, too, loathe the “resolutions” practice and I consider it barbaric self-abuse, an excuse to beat ourselves up for our perceived failures.

    Thanks so much for this insightful post and great alternative suggestions ❤

  8. Simple but not easy. Thanks for the reminder. I may drill it down to just one promise. Because when I look at these, they read as three ways to say the same thing. Here’s one way I put it: I promise to love myself and treat myself as well as I do a cherished friend.

  9. love this!!! This was the subject of an article I wrote for Elements mag!!! 🙂

  10. I completely agree about banishing New Year’s resolutions, (except maybe for tiny ones), as it can be a very unpleasant set-up for a sense of failure. And I love your 3 promises!

  11. I never make New Years Resolutions, haven’t done for more than a decade. Making promises like you say is far more effective. I loved reading your publication