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4 Positive Ways to Squash that Judgmental Bug & Let the Loving you *Shine*

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4 Positive ways to squash that judgmental bug and shine“Look at the weaknesses of others with compassion, not accusation. It’s not what they’re not doing or should be doing that’s the issue. The issue is your own chosen response to the situation and what you should be doing. If you start to think the problem is “out there,” stop yourself. That thought is the problem.”~ Stephen Covey

We are all striving to become better human beings. As times change and our vibrations move into higher realms and see thinner veils, we become more enlightened – more aware of who we really are and becoming fully conscious that we are all connected. We are one ~ we are perfect.

About Judging Ourself:

We are bombarded through television and other media of what “perfect” is – it is constantly present, on television shows, commercials, advertisements, etc. all expressing an ego based side that is very contrasting to our higher-aware selves. These images can cause feelings of imperfection and a lack of oneness.

We begin to judge ourselves against these images and judge others as well. We forget in a moment our higher selves, our perfect selves, and our oneness. Being exposed to the lower vibrations of television, celebrity magazines or other forms of media can wreak havoc on our self esteem. The criticism and judgment passed onto is sad and unjust.

Many so-called “reality shows” and cosmetic surgery shows and now even home improvement shows only express superficial elements of what is considered beautiful, loveable or desirable. These types of programs can make us judge ourselves and others, enabling us to forget – even if it’s briefly, that we are perfect, in every way.

We cant completely avoid the media but when we can avoid letting the media and imagery of perceived perfection get to us. By tuning into our higher self and living a heart conscious life we can easily see our perfection on every level. We accept ourselves and others without judgment – we see The Divinity in everyone and ourselves. Pure love.

Let’s not allow others to change how we feel about ourself; we are powerful, strong and beautiful. We are perfect and one with God. Judgments of others are not your reality unless you make them so. Judgments to yourself are not your reality unless you make them so.

Loose sight of numbers on scales and clothes and anything which conveys a perceived image of acceptable – and simply accept you as you are, perfect and divine. Listen to how you feel…feel good…feel happy…feel bliss…feel love…As God is perfect, so are you.

Here are some affirmations to use if you wish to incorporate them. Use them to replace any negative or judgmental self talk:

I AM Love
I AM Perfect
I AM Beautiful
I AM the Creator of my world
I AM the Peace I seek
I love ME
I Send Joy to my Body
My Body Heals me
I Care about Me
I Love Life
I AM One with God

About Judging Others:

“Be curious, not judgmental.” – Walt Whitman

In the past 15+ years or so, I have worked and counselled many souls who have been on the receiving end of societal judgment. ‘Why did you stay with him? Why didn’t you leave? Why were you out so late? Why didn’t you wear something more conservative?’ are some of the questions these souls would hear again and again…and these have left very deep scars in their hearts, which take time to heal. We pass judgments and form opinions not realizing how it affects the opposite person. We don’t even bother to get to know these people…yet we can’t keep a handle on that muscle inside our mouth. That tongue is like a whip lash on the heart if left untamed. And this very tongue has the power to inspire and empower with love if we live heart centered lives.

Why do we judge others? Isnt it really the easy way out? We much rather judge others than look at our own issues. Its the perfect cover. It makes us feel superior, like as if we were better than them and that temporarily makes us feel good.  Least do we realize, we are only dwelling deeper into the abyss of negativity with this action.

Do you think you are not judgmental? Believe me, there are times I am a bit judgmental too. We all live with preconcieved notions of whats right and wrong, and the minute someone or something doesn’t fit our bill of perfection we become judgmental.

4 Positive Ways to Squash that Judgmental Bug & Let the Loving you *Shine*

Here are some ways you can use to squash that judgmental bug and let the non-judgmental loving you shine(my personal ways of being non-judgmental):

1} Awareness- Become aware of your thought patterns. This might seem hard to do at first, but once you get used to catching your thoughts in ‘judgmental mode’ you can simply stop them. How? The next way will help you ….

2} Understanding- Develop an understanding of the other person by thinking about why this person acts, talks, dresses or just is a certain way. Try to put yourself in this person’s shoes and wonder why this behavior has emerged. If you want further understanding, you can strike a polite(I emphasize polite) conversation with this person and get to know them. Knowing them, makes you further understand them.

3} Acceptance- Once an understanding has been created in your mind of this person, acceptance of this person just as he/she is becomes easier. Accept that this is the way he/she will react, cause its the way they are made up. There will most certainly always be things you don’t agree with, but that doesn’t mean you cant accept their presence in the world. When you accept, frustration that lead to judgment take an automatic backseat.

4} Love Love Love- Ok so, now you might wonder, whats love got to do with it? I say everything! When you have reached a point of acceptance of things around you a certain calm comes over your complete being. In this calm Love is ever prevalent. It becomes inevitable to love the person you so freely wanted to judge. Atleast try to love him/her…as a fellow human being, as a brother or sister…and realize that you need to give love to this person no matter what he sounds like, looks like, acts like …just love. You might be loving to only a certain degree, and thats ok. The positive effect of this love is not only on the opposite person but on you as well. You become happier when you give love…believe me. I’ve tried and tested this far too many times. Life changing is an understatement for the effects of love.

And really who ever became happy by being judgmental?

What are your thoughts on this topic? Have you successfully become non-judgmental towards yourself and others? Do you have any personal tips to share about how we all can become more loving and less judgmental? Please do share your thoughts, comments and questions in the comments section below. I’d love to hear from you.


Thank you SO much for reading! If this article touched your heart, please share it on your favorite social networks. Every share, like or tweet makes me reach more people who need a positive healing nudge in their lives. I appreciate you! And, If you’re new, please subscribe for free updates by email. 

With Immense Love & Gratitude, ~Zeenat~

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Author: Zeenat {PositiveProvocations.com}

Counseling Psychologist/ Spiritual Counselor/Motivational Speaker/Naturopath/Holistic Healer/Writer

19 thoughts on “4 Positive Ways to Squash that Judgmental Bug & Let the Loving you *Shine*

  1. Very well articulated, Zeenat. The way things are explained here is strongly reminiscent of Vedic teachings which emphatically states that our core at the highest level of awareness is pure bliss. The manifold complexities and strife in worldly existence arise from people choosing to dwell at lower levels of awareness, shackled by ego and obsessions, such as greed, hatred, lust for power and pelf, emanating from ego. May life keep you blessed. Best….xo.

  2. I am guilty of being judgmental at many occasions but I believe in learning and I have learnt all these lessons of life dear Zeenat. Thanks for the reminders, we need them as we keep slipping back into our old ways, which we pick up from the society. Love and hugs.

  3. Love your affirmations, Zeenat – they are definitely helpful and worth keeping in sight so we don’t forget. Thank you!

  4. I am trying not to be judgmental and still it keeps creeping in and then I feel guilty . You write great point and love your affirmations Zeenat.

  5. Beautifully said, Zeenat. Thank you for these helpful affirmations and practical options so we can living from a more loving place. I’ve been employing phrases like, “So what!” lately to lighten up and remove judgment from situations. Like, “So what, I’m not perfect and it’s okay.” And, of course this applies to others too.

  6. Thanks for such a comforting and insightful post, Zeenat. I love this:

    “Look at the weaknesses of others with compassion, not accusation. It’s not what they’re not doing or should be doing that’s the issue. The issue is your own chosen response to the situation and what you should be doing. If you start to think the problem is “out there,” stop yourself. That thought is the problem.”~ Stephen Covey

    I do fairly well with not judging myself or others these days. By learning to extend forgiveness and understanding to myself for my many huge bloopers in my past, I found myself being able to do the same for others.

  7. I love the Walt Whitman quote – be curious not judgemental. It goes along with my own experience recently. The more I allowed curiosity to play with me, the less judgemental I was. The less judgemental I was, the more I played with paint, words, yarn. The more I played, the more joy I felt. I love your post Zeenat! ❤

  8. I love how your post radiates compassion and understanding, to ourselves and others. Judgements is really one of the biggest separating forces, it injures the person who is being judged and also the person who passed the judgement. I appreciate your words about all the way we are bombarded with impossible images and ideas by the media. Beautiful post, beautiful Zeenat.

  9. Today I drew the acceptance card and I realise that the more I live and be kind to me the less judgement I have Beautiful post

  10. Yes “Be curious, not judgmental.” – Walt Whitman when we are curious e can be free os judgement and today i drew the Acceptance card 🙂 When we fully love ourselves , we release all judgement. xx love and hugs

  11. Such a lovely post! I think every one on the face of the earth can relate to this — no one is completely immune from judgement! I love your 4 steps that can be used for oneself or toward others. xo

  12. I love this post Zeenat! The way I transform my judgement of myself or others is through curiosity and wonder. Staying in this place of love and mindfulness I am able to accept myself and not project my insecurities on others, which usually is my source of judgement. When I fail to do that, I ask what is being mirrored by this person that I could heal in myself so that I am not coming from judgement and criticism? When I embrace that we are all doing the best that we can, I respond to myself and others with love and kindness, which is what ultimately heals all! Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom!

  13. I also love the quotes. Thanks for the affirmations.

  14. Wonderful message, Zeenat. Bold, beautiful and gentle. Isn’t that how we should with ourselves? Thank you for the inspirational affirmations and 4 Positive Ways to Squash that Judgmental Bug & Let the Loving you *Shine*.

  15. HI Zeenat, Important post! Thanks for reminding us not to be judgmental. This is a HUGE issue for all of us. I especially love your affirmations and 4 strategies. Thanks for sharing your wisdom. Warm Hugs, Pam

  16. Great affirmations Zeenat. Judgement is such a negative proposition and as you say never brought anything good into life.

  17. I so agree that the media makes us feel like we’re not enough exactly as we are. Your affirmations are a great antidote, Zeenat 🙂

  18. Dear Zeenat,
    Thank you for this encouraging article.
    It is true in my experience, as well, that judging someone does not really bring happiness into anybody’s life.
    Personally, I also cannot always avoid having judgements. But I can choose how to act on them instead of just reacting. The four ways that you are pointing out – awareness, understanding, acceptance, love – have proven very helpful to me, too, and I find them to be beautiful reminders of how powerful our choice of action can be. ❤
    Much love,
    Steffi

  19. Great post as always Zeenat and excellent tips for squashing the judgment bug 🙂 A great tip that I am regularly trying to practice is to put ourselves in other people’s shoes, to see things from their point of view and to understand where they are coming from. It’s not easier but I am on the path towards greater compassion and understanding towards others, instead of judgment.