Be it trusting the wrong person or being too giving or any other pattern that gives you a sense of unease after. It could be actions, words or events in patterns that you don’t completely understand, as to why they keep happening to you?

We start to question why this is happening to us again and again and again. Why me? Why does this happen to me repeatedly?

Does this Sounds familiar to you?

Lets think about this : all of us go through negative recurring patterns with something or the other, usually someone or the other. Incidents that are completely unrelated to each other manifest themselves as patterns once we recognize their negative vibrations.

For Example- A woman who after an abusive marriage, walked into another marriage with a guy who not just had an extra-marital affair, but had repeated affairs and was also mentally abusive. This woman comes from a good, educated and well off background and is an intelligent and for the whole part a well-sorted person. Now, are you wondering how such an intelligent, bright and evolved woman could have chosen wrong both times for herself! And keeps living in those negative patterns….

Such a recurring pattern IS definitely negative, but let’s find the Positive in it! 

When we are surrounded by crap, we are unlikely to note the positives; they get taken for granted. We are convinced that we are essentially good people and so don’t question the good things that come our way. It’s only when things start going wrong that we start watching out for and questioning patterns! It’s then that we start blaming the world around for the chaos we find ourselves in. But is the world where the problem really is? Is this negative pattern an external force jeopardizing our life or is it within?

Why do we get into Negative patterns repeatedly? Here comes the positive…..

We get into these self destructive, negative patterns because there are lessons to be learnt from our past that we haven’t learned and till such time that we do so, we will find ourselves falling into the same trap again and again and again. That thought in itself consoling but still tedious to my heart!

Negative patterns are like scars that haven’t healed. Rather scars we have not allowed to heal. When we have a wound, if we keep touching it, keep itching, keep fidgeting with it, it becomes poisonous, septic and painful. But when we apply an ointment on it, take efforts to let it breathe and heal, it does! Right?!

But still as human beings we love to blame Destiny for some of these negative recurrences, even though some could be due to flaws in our own personality, but we fail to see them. Its easier to blame Destiny, Fate and God…. Its hard work to take ownership of our faults and work on them. This will mean we need to kick that EGO that we love to massage so diligently!

A negative pattern is a defense mechanism called projective identification where we attract through our behavior or our body’s vibrations – incidents, situations, life events or people who inflict similar kind of pain or act in a manner that helps our whole environment to go horribly wrong. And then we say the world is too chaotic for us!  We become paranoid to say the least.

How to kick Negative Patterns from Your Life

Now that we know what these Negative Patterns really are, lets get to how we can kick such destructive negative patterns.

1} AWARENESS ~ We NEED to come to an understanding and an acceptance that we are victims of such a negative pattern. Then we must let go of the ego and again accept, that the problem is within, not outside us. We have to understand that the negativity we visualize in our world, is actually a reflection of the negativity within us. We are attracting those people and situations towards us. Its a hard pill to swallow, but taking ownership often is! Awareness is the first necessary step.

2} POSITIVE SOUL SEARCHING ~ To come to a level of where we take ownership of our life takes a lot of soul searching. Even if we cannot understand why we are on this negative path, just an awareness that we are on it, is enough to set us on the path of healing.  The truth is, these negative situations, incidents or people are not really destructive, but positive in terms of Spiritual growth because they help make us aware of the problem within. Pain especially emotional pain is a calling from our soul, that invites us to look within to heal it.

Evolving into a Positive Soul

When we become aware of the pain that is deep within, we begin to start taking ownership of our thoughts, our feelings and our life….this level of higher consciousness facilitates positive change and deep soul healing. We stop blaming the world or destiny for our problems and infact begin to pray for healing for our self and for all those who cross our path in this world, be it a negative or positive crossing. We understand that these negative patterns are infact penetrable, breakable and the power to do so is WITHIN.

And, it’s when you start thinking positively about your relationship with yourSELF, that all the relationships in your life begin to take a positive turn. When the ego diminishes, we see ourselves for who we truly are and who we would like to become. We become our own best friend. This is that pivotal point when the negative patterns break.  You will then automatically attract only positive people and situations in your life. And, whenever a negative pattern begins to emerge, you will know the work needs to be done within.

I am Only Human!

For me personally, I have to admit, that there are still a few negative patterns I am working on. I am no saint, nor do I intend to be. I am only Human! But although I am a predominant positive thinker, sometimes old wounds I never thought existed come to the surface. I don’t get discouraged by them. I simply take it as a sign and start working on healing the wound and breaking the negative pattern.

Kicking these negative patterns from our lives is a process, but a highly rewarding and spiritually fulfilling one. Those higher planes of consciousness don’t just open up without a bit of pain. No pain no gain 🙂

What about YOU? Have you noticed any negative patterns in your life? Have you identified them and healed them? Share your thoughts and questions in the comments and lets heal together! 

image credit/source