“Look at the weaknesses of others with compassion, not accusation. It’s not what they’re not doing or should be doing that’s the issue. The issue is your own chosen response to the situation and what you should be doing. If you start to think the problem is “out there,” stop yourself. That thought is the problem.”~ Stephen Covey
As time keeps changing and our vibrations are moving into higher realms and seeing thinner veils, we become more enlightened – more aware of who we really are and becoming fully conscious that we are all connected. We are one ~ we are perfect.
About Judging Ourself:
We are bombarded through television and other media of what “perfect” is – it is constantly present, on television shows, commercials, advertisements, etc. all expressing an ego based side that is very contrasting to our higher-aware selves. These images can cause feelings of imperfection and a lack of oneness.
We begin to judge ourselves against these images and judge others as well. We forget in a moment our higher selves, our perfect selves, and our oneness. Being exposed to the lower vibrations of television, celebrity magazines or other forms of media can wreak havoc on our self esteem. The criticism and judgment passed onto is sad and unjust.
Many so-called “reality shows” and cosmetic surgery shows and now even home improvement shows only express superficial elements of what is considered beautiful, loveable or desirable. These types of programs can make us judge ourselves and others, enabling us to forget – even if it’s briefly, that we are perfect, in every way.
We cant completely avoid the media but when we can avoid letting the media and imagery of perceived perfection get to us. By tuning into our higher self and living a heart conscious life we can easily see our perfection on every level. We accept ourselves and others without judgment – we see The Divinity in everyone and ourselves. Pure love.
Let’s not allow others to change how we feel about ourself; we are powerful, strong and beautiful. We are perfect and one with God. Judgments of others are not your reality unless you make them so. Judgments to yourself are not your reality unless you make them so.
Loose sight of numbers on scales and clothes and anything which conveys a perceived image of acceptable – and simply accept you as you are, perfect and divine. Listen to how you feel…feel good…feel happy…feel bliss…feel love…As God is perfect, so are you.
Here are some affirmations to use if you wish to incorporate them. Use them to replace any negative or judgmental self talk:
I AM Love
I AM Perfect
I AM Beautiful
I AM the Creator of my world
I AM the Peace I seek
I love ME
I Send Joy to my Body
My Body Heals me
I Care about Me
I Love Life
I AM One with God
About Judging Others:
“Be curious, not judgmental.” – Walt Whitman
In the past 10 years or so, I have worked and counselled many souls who have been on the receiving end of societal judgment. ‘Why did you stay with him? Why didn’t you leave? Why were you out so late? Why didn’t you wear something more conservative?’ are some of the questions these souls would hear again and again…and these have left very deep scars in their hearts, which take time to heal. We pass judgments and form opinions not realizing how it affects the opposite person. We don’t even bother to get to know these people…yet we can’t keep a handle on that muscle inside our mouth. That tongue is like a whip lash on the heart if left untamed. And this very tongue has the power to inspire and empower with love if we live heart centered lives.
Why do we judge others? Isnt it really the easy way out? We much rather judge others than look at our own issues. Its the perfect cover. It makes us feel superior, like as if we were better than them and that temporarily makes us feel good. Least do we realize, we are only dwelling deeper into the abyss of negativity with this action.
Do you think you are not judgmental? Believe me, there are times I am a bit judgmental too. We all live with preconcieved notions of whats right and wrong, and the minute someone or something doesn’t fit our bill of perfection we become judgmental.
Here are some ways you can use to squash that judgmental bug and let the non-judgmental loving you shine(my personal ways of being non-judgmental):
- Awareness- Become aware of your thought patterns. This might seem hard to do at first, but once you get used to catching your thoughts in ‘judgmental mode’ you can simply stop them. How? The next way will help you ….
- Understanding- Develop an understanding of the other person by thinking about why this person acts, talks, dresses or just is a certain way. Try to put yourself in this person’s shoes and wonder why this behavior has emerged. If you want further understanding, you can strike a polite(I emphasize polite) conversation with this person and get to know them. Knowing them, makes you further understand them.
- Acceptance- Once an understanding has been created in your mind of this person, acceptance of this person just as he/she is becomes easier. Accept that this is the way he/she will react, cause its the way they are made up. There will most certainly always be things you dont agree with, but that doesn’t mean you cant accept their presence in the world. When you accept, frustration that lead to judgment take an automatic backseat.
- Love Love Love-Ok so, now you might wonder, whats love got to do with it? I say everything! When you have reached a point of acceptance of things around you a certain calm comes over your complete being. In this calm Love is ever prevalent. It becomes inevitable to love the person you so freely wanted to judge. Atleast try to love him/her…as a fellow human being, as a brother or sister…and realize that you need to give love to this person no matter what he sounds like, looks like, acts like …just love. You might be loving to only a certain degree, and thats ok. The positive effect of this love is not only on the opposite person but on you as well. You become happier when you give love…believe me. I’ve tried and tested this far too many times. Life changing is an understatement for the effects of love.And really who ever became happy by being judgmental?
What are your thoughts on this topic? Have you successfully become non-judgmental towards yourself and others? What are the preconceived notions you carry within you that make you react in a judgmental way? Do you have any personal tips to share about how we all can become more loving and less judgmental? Please do share your thoughts, comments and questions in the comments section below. I’d love to hear from you.
“Special Mention: Illuminations from the Heart is a weekly subscription letter by Sandra Pawula of Always Well Within. Its beautiful and Insightful, just as the author herself. Please CLICK HERE to find out how you can receive this in your inbox.“
With Immense Love & Gratitude,
Counseling Psychologist/ Spiritual Counselor
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Further Positive Reading:
- 9 Simple Ways to Get Rid of a Negative Mindset (positiveprovocations.com)
- How to Live a Phenomenally Miraculous Life (positiveprovocations.com)
- Four ways to make sure that today ends better than yesterday (positiveprovocations.com)
- Transform Yourself with Self-Compassion (positiveprovocations.com)