“Do all the good you can. By all the means you can. In all the ways you can. In all the places you can. At all the times you can. To all the people you can. As long as ever you can.”― John Wesley
Having traveled extensively to many countries and meeting many many souls, I have noticed one common negative trait in almost 95% of people(for sometime even me!). What is this negative trait?
Here it is: We do good(awesome!), but only because we feel like we are going to get something back in return(not so awesome!). Doing good for personal gain is no good at all.
As an occupational hazard, I tend to analyze everything. So, when someone I know made a huge donation to a charity dear to my heart I was mighty pleased ofcourse….up until this ‘someone’ started talking to press and media about the huge donation they had made. Now I know these people…I know they started out donating money to this charity out of the goodness of their heart. But, almost unconsciously, when that goodness of heart turned into self promotion and self gain is hard to pin point.
Negative or Positive Mental Conditioning
I believe it all starts with our mental conditioning. We have been trained since childhood to be a certain way or do a certain act to please someone else. As children we were told “If you want your teacher to like you, be on your best behavior “, “If you do well is your exams, you will get a new toy.” ….We have been brought up to believe that all good acts we do deserve a gift or remuneration of some sort. While I have nothing against positive reinforcement, we must realize that there is a very fine line between ‘positive reinforcement’ and ‘promoting personal gain’.
What if we were brought up to believe that every good act we do was good for our heart, for our mind and our soul? What is we were brought up to believe that all good acts we do bring immense joy to us and to the person we are doing it for?
Since I have realized this trait was present in me too, I have kept myself in check by asking myself a simple question before I do any GOOD act for anyone. I ask myself “What am I expecting in return?” If a bit of personal gain comes up, I correct that thinking by telling myself “I do all GOOD acts only for JOY.”
With practice we can let go of the negative ‘personal gain’ mindset and just DO good for the joy of it. What a wonderful world that would be 🙂
Here are 12 ways to Just DO Good for the Joy of it:
- Lend your shoulder to someone who needs it without judging their story.
- Donate a small amount to a charity anonymously.
- Teach someone something they need to learn without making them feel like you know best and they don’t.
- Solve someones problem without rubbing it in their face at anytime in the present or future.
- Appreciate someone even though you know they have never been kind to you.
- Tell someone you believe in them without really expecting the same support back.
- Alter or change your plans for someone you love, without ever expecting the same from them.
- Ask someone, “Can I do something for you today?”…then do it and let it go.
- Allow someone else to teach you a thing a two, even though you might be closed minded about it.
- Forgive someone who has wronged you, not because you are proving to be better than them, but because you have genuine compassion for them.
- Leave an appreciative comment/line in someones inbox. Not because you want to show them you are so nice, but because you genuinely care.
- ………………………this one is for you. Share one way you can just do good for the joy of it in the comments below. Lets learn from each other.
Human tendency dictates that we will make mistakes and we will get on the negative mindset wagon once in a while. And that is ok. The important thing is we started off with good intention hence when this negative mindset sets in, we can make an effort to change it. It gets easier with practice…I promise. I’m living proof of it.
Lets just DO GOOD and teach our children to DO Good too, cause that’s how we are laying the foundation for a truly positive and loving world.
What are your thoughts on this topic? Share your thoughts and your own ways to DO GOOD with me in the comments below. I love learning from your wisdom!
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With Immense Love & Gratitude,
~Zeenat~
Counseling Psychologist/ Spiritual Counselor
Motivational Speaker/Naturopath
Holistic Healer/Writer
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Listen, just listen. Often times that is the most wonderful thing you can do for someone.
Dear Mantha,
You are so right! Sometimes just lending a ear to someone can make all the difference to them. Its so weird, that one of the most basic skills we each possess “listening” has become such an obsolete act.
Thank you for sharing your way of Doing Good. A lovely healing way for sure 🙂
Much Love~
Complaining less and less to other people, instead pointing out positives about life to uplift their and your spirits. Although the temptation may be hard to resist daily, the hopes are to overcome a negative outlook which not only hurts our soul but also that of others, like spreading poison.
Give a smile !
Dear Elaine,
A smile can be SO healing. Thank you for being the one who brought a Smile to my face today.
Lots of love to you~
A wonderful thought, Thank you!
HI Oksana,
So glad you liked this post and the thought behind it.
Thank you for your lovely comment here.
Much Love~
Hi Yanuary,
What a beautiful DO Good thought! Complaining less and pointing out the positives…I’d like to add thinking positive about others all the time too 🙂
Thank you for sharing your wonderful thoughts with me here.
Much Love~
I think once we get that we are always rewarded for doing good then we don’t need to advertise any good we do Zeenat. Simply being in the vibration of it (high) radiates outwards from us helping raise the vibration of the world and then it comes right back to us in greater amounts than we gave out.
It’s just universal law operating. We’re all one. All part of the oneness of life.
Love Elle
xoxo
Dear Elle,
The universe has a beautiful way of giving us all that we want and so much more …. especially when we Do good without expectation..then anything and everything is a beautiful gift 🙂
We are indeed all part of the Universal Oneness.
Thank you for your loving words here.
Much Love~
Your first suggestion speaks to me. Really listening to someone, acknowledging someone and just being there for someone makes a huge impact on others. It’s one of the most profound ways of connecting and giving.
Hi Anne,
I am all for listening! My whole career path is kinda based on that 🙂 But really, in todays world, I feel people are feeling less and less heard. When we listen we show genuine care.
Thank you for your beautiful comment here.
Much Love~
The list is comprehensive and testing. That is good. Giving until it hutrs is a good measure. Many times however it is great to just remember times and things which stress someone and just text a smilie face. Being there, quietly.
Hi Joe,
I love all your DO Good suggestions so much. They show how you already think so Good 🙂
Thank you for sharing your wisdom here.
Much Love~
Zeenat, I know that I was brought up to do good for others simply because the other person needed what I could give to them. I know that this sentiment can get lost as we grow up though. Our world is rather a selfish one, so often we need something that will make us see what good to others can do for us. This is reality, sad but true.
Hi Glynis,
And you were certainly brought up with the right values. Its also true that the world has become selfish…but when we can be Do Gooders without expectation, we are atleast sharing positive vibes…we do our part and hopefully the world will come around 🙂
Thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts here.
Much Love~
I thought I would share a little lesson I learned one day while walking in London. I was approached by a rather well dressed man who had a sad story of having lost his money and the keys to a rather smart car to which he pointed, so he needed a specific amount to get a train home. I gave him the money and as he walked away the car which he claimed was his, drove away also. I had been duped. Since that day I resolved to give something to the first ‘beggar’ I saw each day – whether they asked for it or not – and without caring what the money may be used for – so that my intention of helping is not devalued by thieves.
Hi Joe,
I applaud you for your commitment to do good…although as we have seen a number of times in our lives ..it is a selfish world. But we can be the positive ones in that crowd and make a difference. right 🙂
Thank you for sharing your wonderful story with me here.
Much Love~
Wonderful
thank you darling Swathi 🙂 and Love~
The smile that blooms in the face of a little one when you offer them what they desperately need is really divine…If we help the little ones, especially the children who are denied of what the normal kids get ,we’ll be really blessed to bear the witness of the miracle called ‘pure smile” that radiates in their’ innocent’,’ holiness’, painted face….I think this feeling can never be matched….
Dear Aashna,
Thats such a beautiful sentiment and act. A smile from the heart is truly a healing and giving Good act.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts here.
Much love~
Share something to a stranger whether it’s a food, clothes or money.
Reblogged this on KimmiCullen.